Conflict Resolution Exercise

Conflict Resolution Exercise

When you are in a conflict situation with another person(s), there is something you can do within your own body that is quite effective to encourage the power struggle to lessen and resolution to become possible.  This conflict resolution exercise is simple and can be done even while in the midst of trying to communicate with another person.  The main challenge is to remember to try this WHILE you are in conflict - it is often the time you will be least willing and able to take any responsibility for lessening the conflict!


  1. Put your attention on your solar plexus, the area right below your sternum (breastbone).  Breathe to that area, and try and relax and loosen it if it feels tight.  You may notice a numb or tingling sensation there after your attention is on it for a few moments. 
  2. Now put your attention on your chest, under your sternum.  Again, use your breath to stretch the area so that it feels a little more flexible and pliant. 
  3. Now imagine that there is a circle of energy rotating between your solar plexus and sternum, cycling life force to flow between the two areas.  You may encourage this in a loop pattern, or a line between, it doesn't matter.  Just get some energy or a visual picture of energy moving between the areas. 
  4. Do this for a few seconds up to a few minutes.  

 When you stay inside your own 'home' (body),  your interactions with others

will be more honest, clear and productive.   

Notice what happens to the conflict in the time right after you do this short exercise.  99% of the time there will be a softening in at least one of the party's point of view and/or ability to listen.  Suddenly the conversation will become less reactive and more solution oriented. 

Often there will be a marked difference in how you are feeling towards the other person(s), and the stress level in your body decreases.  At the very least, putting your attention on your own body brings your energy more within, and immediately you will be more effective.

I have used this technique countless times in my life, and still do.  With all the different wounds we are carrying around, we need as many tools as possible to help us be easier in our lives.  Even if you feel you need to make a strong stand on something or set a firm boundary, this simple exercise can help you do it without negativity and the desire to hurt another.  This is the beginning of the end of war.